As if her Daisy Dukes couldn’t get any smaller, look what Jessica wore to the UK premiere of The Dukes of Hazzard! And it looks like she dyed her hair brown and got some huge breast implants. Oh, actually this is British “model” Jordan, who “upstaged” Jessica at her own premiere, according The Sun. If by “upstaged,” they mean succeeded in being more skanky than Jessica Simpson on one isolated occasion, I think they could actually be right, and really that is an achievement worthy of the highest congratulations.
Jordan attended the premiere with her husband Peter Andre, who not only committed several sartorial crimes himself, but spanked her in public! I’m starting to understand why Michael K loves them so much.