Looking like she may have been squirting the SPF60 up her crusty brown nose, Tan Mom forgot to learn the words but shut up whatever, so she’ll just mash her CORN KERNEL TEETHYPOOPS till it’s all over and then shush ‘cos she’s a mom or whatever!
Is she the sun’s mom or something, like she’s come down to earth to promote, as she puts it “seeing her goodies brown” [I was just sick through my nose]?!
“Hotter than Octomom”, yeah hun, only cos you pushed a sunshine out of your BACON ‘BITS’N’BITES’ CRUSTY FLAPS; it takes a while to cool down from those kind of first-degree labour skabs!
[via jezebel]
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