!! OMG, Well That Sucked: The VMA’s !!

Normally I’d start the morning after the VMA’s with some highlights from the MTV awards show. Unfortunately this morning there are no highlights because it was the most boring shit I ever saw in my life. The whole time I was just wishing that I could have been watching last year’s awards instead. I mean, right? Remember how great that was? Meanwhile, I’ve already forgotten who performed last night. (I got all excited for a second when I saw Robyn and then she was instantly gone. WTF?)

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14 Comments on "OMG, Well That Sucked: The VMA’s"

  1. HSK Exclusive – I came, I saw, I conquered. I just rolled the dice trying to get some change. Allow me to re-introduce myself.
    When you hear these lines, do you think of Brooklyn’s own, self-proclaimed G.O.A.T? Or…if you have read Dater Blackwell’s novel, Under These Circumstances, you just might think of her.
    “I’ve told people this for years and no one believed me until they saw the dates on my material,” said Blackwell, “but then again no one believed Sophia Stewart either.” Stewart wrote The Matrix and The Terminator and later won a copyright infringement lawsuit after the movies release.
    The first time novelist states that content from her novel, Under These Circumstances, appeared on Jay-Z’s Black Album without her approval. Blackwell completed her first novel in May 2003 and sent it to several hip-hop companies. She felt well-known publishing houses would not understand the raw content. The novel is based on a Dominican drug cartel and three North Carolina A & T students. She was shocked to learn as she listened to Jay-Z’s Black Album in November 2003 that he’d plagiarized her work.
    It’s been said that truth is stranger than fiction! This is where her story becomes strangely true. Jay-Z just bought his wife a PRIVATE ISLAND, threw her a party and filled the room with ORCHIDS. All straight out of the pages of Blackwell’s novel! Could this novel be the BLUEPRINT to Jay-Z’s coveted private life?
    Meet Fidel Sanchez and Simone Sanders. Fidel and his associates travel to Greensboro, North Carolina to get away from the evil they’ve committed in the Dominican Republic and Miami. Fidel owns a yacht, affectionately named Sea Moan, that he sails between the Dominican Republic and Miami, as well as, other islands. A scene from a Miami hotel suite in the novel reminds me of a line in Kanye’s song Flashing Lights.
    ‘I’m more of trips to Florida, order the h’ordervers, views of the water, straight from the page of your favorite author.’
    If you’re skeptical and think this is just another claim as former associate Calvin “Klein” Bacote made about Jay-Z portraying himself as his character on his Reasonable Doubt CD, you must read the novel for yourself. And if you think this is deep, there’s more. Blackwell has another card up her sleeve. Jay-Z has even quoted the characters in her novel in public interviews with several magazines…after 2003! She said each time she saw or heard something that came from her book over the years she showed it to her friends and they laughed, especially when the rumors were swirling about him and Rihanna.
    The physical similarity of the characters and certain people in Jay-Z’s life is uncanny. For instance, when reading about Robyn Thomas from Blackwell’s novel, and you think about Rihanna of today, you will gasp. Robyn is light-skinned, short hair, gray eyes and has a tattoo of a lightning bolt on the back of her neck! Rihanna has stars! Robyn makes Winter Santiaga(Coldest Winter Ever) look like a nun and it’s easy to see why Jay-Z became obsessed with her and the other characters in the book. Once you read why Robyn came, saw and conquered you will never look at your favorite rapper the same! Did Jay-Z really morph Rihanna into Robyn’s character? Hmmmmm?!
    “Journalists within the hip-hop industry know about my novel but they’re scared of him or something, I can’t call it. I guess they believe he really is God, but when and if they finally ask him about it, as soon as he denies it, I’m going to reveal every line that he’s said…in black and white. He’s not Fidel Sanchez, Raul Santana or any of the other villains in my novel, yet he’s using their lines. It’s funny, because as astute as Jay-Z claims he is, he really hanged himself!”
    Blackwell said she has no plans of suing Jay-Z although many people told her she should. Exposing him is enough for her. She said somehow she knew there was something bigger going on with her novel and what he did and is still doing. She also added this whole ordeal will happen in four phases.
    This interview is phase one. Phase two will be the exposure of her characters’ quotes that he used during his magazine interviews if he dares deny what he did. Phase three will be Jay-Z trying to keep her novel away from his wife and her leaving him after she reads it. The final phase will be his renunciation of the name Hova.

  2. lipsynktastic.

  3. I think I confused people here– I posted Beyonce’s Single Ladies performance from the 2009 VMAs to highlight how much better that show was– aside from Beyonce, 2009 also had instant-classic performances from Gaga, Jay-Z/Alicia Keyes, and yes, even poor Taylor Swift. This year had virtually nothing, except a decent (but not earthshaking) effort from Florence and the Machine and 30 seconds of Robyn.
    Anyway, I should have been more clear about why I posted the Beyonce video. Sorry for the confusion!

  4. beyonce didn’t perform…?
    she wasn’t even there, that’s last years performance of single ladies.
    is everyone confused?

  5. Single ladies? Has somebody ckecked the calendar?
    Is this 2010?
    That really sucked

  6. You guys are all an effing mess, Beyonce was fierce and I loved everything else, you bitches are seriously jaded and need do better if you think you can!
    Love GAGA she is god and Cher is AMAZING!!

  7. Florence killed it, that’s all that really mattered to me in the end.

  8. I had high hopes for Ms. Handler, but sadly, she bombed. She was a nervous mess, she just seemed off her game. Like someone’s mother trying to carry a show directed towards tweens and teens. At least she still has her own show to fall back on.
    The performances were horrible(someone really needs to silence that twat Taylor Swift), except Florence and the fucking 7.8 seconds of Robyn. I about pissed myself when I saw her, so surprised, but let down as soon as they cut her off. The VMAs are just a dying art that was never really a piece of art to begin with.
    Turn your televisions off, Mtv has been dead for years.

  9. i don’t think the crowd understood chelsea like her normal viewers do. i’m still disappointed that rihanna showed up on that eminem song. and the b.o.b./bruno mars/paramore mashup seemed really cheap.

  10. I just want to know WHY on earth this song is still showing up everywhere. It was already dead on the ground when Glee picked it up and mauled it again in that stupid football episode.

  11. wow…that was BLAND and BORING.
    beyonce acts/moves like a stepford robot, and her voice has no range. her singing style is bleeting and whiny. and her legs look like sandbags. she sure shows a lot of crotch, too. this passes for talent? what an embarrassing “entertainer.”

  12. At least they had a legit performer: Florence Welch.
    I did not watch the VMAs, however, and am not sorry I didn’t. Be like me, Bmad, and give up hope that MTV will produce something worthwhile. They ended that a long time ago, when their network stopped being about music… I claim “false advertising.”

  13. ugh i know i had a mini heart attack when i saw Robyn and then they cover her with an ad; she deserved the whole show!

  14. The crowd sucked and did not laugh at Chelsea’s hilariousness, but Gaga saved the day by taking home lke–everything!

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