So a bunch of tipsters have alerted us to the above YouTube clip, which I guess either means that a lot of people are interested in it or that some viral PR marketing genius is trying to spark another Susan Boyle Craze. I’ll assume it’s the former, but honestly I have a few pressing questions when it comes to this video from THE X-FACTOR. I don’t get it!
First of all, excuse me for being such an ignorant American “wanker” but is Simon Cowell now the star of every television program in England? I know there’s been a recent Jade Goody shortage and everything, but really, can’t Shilpa Shetty pinch hit or something? It’s getting embarrassing.
Okay, that’s question one. Question two is what the hell are all these British people in the audience freaking out about? I guess the idea is that everyone thinks this man is onstage doing his terrible singing with a giant boner in his pants but, um, guess what: this is not what a boner looks like. It’s just not. If I hadn’t seen so much scally/chav porn, I might be tempted to assume that UK boners are round and bulbous rather than long and cylindrical like, you know, a D, but the sad fact is that I’m quite familiar with the Triga catalog, which means I’m well aware that British people have normal boners just like everyone else. So like Dan at HitDanBack, I find myself asking what the f*ck? I guess this man just has a really big basket but is that something to go this crazy over? I thought people liked big baskets! Shouldn’t they be applauding?
If someone can educate me about exactly what is going on here I would really appreciate it.
(Brought to our attention by Hachiko and others!)